YOU AR STRANGLING ME! WHAT SORT OF LOVE IS THIS?

Cyrus Daily Messages

During this period, Baba called Sadashiv Patel to Mahabaleshwar from Poona. There were only three cots in Shapoor Hall for Eruch, Bhau or Savak and Jal. Baba specifically told them not to give their bed to Sadashiv when he came, but to tell him to put his bedding roll on the floor and sleep there. During this period, Baba would retire to his room at 1:00 P.M. for rest, and Bhau was on watch by him from 1:00 to 11:00 P.M., then Savak would take over until 6:00 A.M. the next morning.

Sadashiv arrived in Mahabaleshwar at 4:00 P.M. Bhau was with Baba, but when he went to the mandali’s room at 11:00 P.M., he found Sadashiv fast asleep on his cot. Thinking that Sadashiv was a very old and close lover of Baba since 1918, Bhau did not have the heart to wake him, and instead slept on the floor.

The next day, Baba sent for him and asked where he had slept. Bhau said his cot had already been occupied by Sadashiv, so he slept on the floor. “Why didn’t you wake him up?” Baba inquired.

Bhau said, “He is old, Baba. It would not have been proper to disturb his sleep.”

Baba scolded, “You thought of Sadashiv not liking it, but you had no thought of what I would like! You have hurt me more than you can ever know by disobeying me, and this hurt will never heal! I could not rest for a single minute last night. You have pained me in order to make Sadashiv comfortable. Do you find pleasure in hurting me? Is that why you have come to stay with me?

When, despite my order, you have thoughts of what is good and proper, you will never be able to obey me. You only think of your feelings, not of mine.

“What have you to do if Sadashiv is my old-time lover? He may even be my father! Of what concern is it to you? Are you here to think about such things, or to obey me? You are an unbaked pot (raw, inexperienced) and cannot be trusted. You think of others, never of me. You are strangling me! What sort of love is this?”

Bhau acknowledged his mistake and Baba forgave him.

Lord Meher, American ed., Bhau Kalchuri, Vol. 15, pp. 5373 – 5374.